The kid is pedaling slowly down the center of my lane on a busy street that bisects our vibrant downtown district. It is rush hour, in gloomy winter twilight. He is wearing dark hipster colors. He is not wearing a helmet. The bike has no lights. A dog trots...
Snips and Snails and Puppy Dog Tails
“I’m an EMT,” says the large loud brusque woman, elbowing her way in front of me at the grocery store. We are standing in the self-check-out line. “I’m in a hurry. I’m going first.” She doesn’t even look at me as she cuts me off. She is not in...
Pride, Prejudice, Pot, and Pants
Guns don’t kill people. Pants kill people. A gentleman in Tennessee recently shot himself in the chin when he took off his pants and placed them on his dresser, “at which time the 25 caliber Baretta pistol in the right front pocket discharged.” You’ve got to love a police...
“Jesus, Lady!”
I am driving in Old Town near the university last night on rutted ice-packed streets in the dark. It’s a busy area where pedestrians and bicyclists rule, where crosswalks zebra-stripe the roads and where police are apt to lie in wait for traffic transgressors. To their credit, in this...
The Death of Fun and Pineapple
I’m trussed up like a Thanksgiving turkey, bloomered and bonneted and petticoated and caped, singing Christmas carols at a nursing home. The assembled residents are far more grateful than we deserve – my quartet of Victorian-clad singers has hired itself out to raise money for the symphonic choir we...